Tuesday, July 17, 2012

My Toddler's Top 10 Demands (er, um, requests...)


My two year old son has several phrases that he repeats all day, every day.  Most of them are disguised as questions, but don't be fooled:  they are most certainly demands.  The following are the ten most common (with translation), number 10 being the most-often "asked."  They are the ones that I hear in my sleep at night.

1.  Hoops again?  (I want to go to the playroom now, to shoot baskets repeatedly while you cheer for me whether I make  the shot or not).
2.  Hiiiiiide? (I want to count to three while pretending to close my eyes, while you hide behind the chair and I find you-- repeatedly.)  
3.  Choo-Choo Room?  (I want you to think I want to leisurely play with trains in the living room, but I am really just looking for a way to get you to go hide again).
4.  Delicious!  (I would be the happiest little boy on earth if you gave me blueberries or vanilla ice cream to eat for every meal).
5.  Car Show?  (I need to watch the two minute segment in Cars where they sing "Life is a Highway" now.  While this part is on, you must jump up and down with me and dance wildly in order for me to fully enjoy it.  You must replay highway segment at least 2 times).
6.  Cookie please.  (Don't let the please fool you.  What I really mean is "cookie NOW.")
7.  TWO Whoas! (If "whoa!" means something really great, saying "TWO whoas!" must mean something is really, really great).
8.  Mama's Car?  (Wherever you have taken me, be it the pool, library, store, or friend's house, I would (much) rather be safely ensconced in Mama's car, on the way home to play cars again (#10), hoops (#1), or throw rocks (#9).
9.  Throw rocks?  (Take me to a pond/lake/fishing hole now so that I throw muddy rocks over and over into said pond.  You must say "big splash" every single time. I won't take no for an answer.  I don't care if it's 98 degrees outside).
10.  Cars again? (You will send Hot Wheels back and forth with me for an indefinite, ungodly amount amount of time.  This will likely be our main activity for the day, so get comfortable Mama.).

~Frantic Mama

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*A shortened version of this is on Felicity Huffman's What the Flicka.