Tuesday, September 10, 2013

On The Eve of Preschool


*I wrote this the night before my son started preschool.

In some ways, I've waited for 3 years for this week.  Bringing home my son (my first baby) from the hospital after he was born in 2010 surprised me in so many ways that I could never have predicted.  Especially just how hard Motherhood was going to be.

So, after years of being with my son almost around the clock, save the occasional babysitter or once-a-year weekend away, my son and I have been attached to each other's daily lives for over 3 years.  3 years.

With all the challenges and exhaustion that come from staying home with babies and toddlers, I thought I would be completely excited for him to start going to school.  After all, it's only 2 and a half hours long, just a few days a week.  But-- and this is what surprises me-- I'm also nervous.  How will he do?  Is he going to cry really hard, pulling on my leg, as I struggle out the classroom door holding my daughter (because yes, I have a toddler too; it's not as if I'll be alone for 2 and a half luxurious hours)?  Will the teachers like him?  Will they see his true personality and appreciate his sense of humor?  Will he be nice to other kids?  Will they be nice to him?  Is this the right choice for him?

Sounds familiar, right?  Like the night before you started school yourself?  And that's what it feels like this time around.  I'm excited for his new chapter, just as I would have been embark on my own new start (high school, college, new job, etc.) but I'm also nervous about all the unknowns.  He is my heart, and I so want this to be a happy experience for all of us, and especially for him.

~Frantic Mama

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